Next Monday (March 30), SEIU-UHW’s Dave Regan and the Coalition of Kaiser Permanente Unions (aka, the “partnership unions") will begin negotiations with Kaiser Permanente for a new labor contract covering 90,000 Kaiser workers in 27 local unions.
In the run-up to Monday's kick-off of negotiations, the partnership unions will have a three-day junket at Disneyland with with Mickey Mouse, Goofy, and the rest of the gang (March 27-29).
Once negotiations begin, partnership officials will undoubtedly describe them as “revolutionary,” dynamic, and the most innovative thing since sliced bread. However, sources have leaked internal documents that reveal that the negotiations are as tightly rigged as a Swiss clock.
Well, check this out. Even though the negotiations have not yet begun… Kaiser execs and partnership union officials have already calendared the precise date when workers will vote to ratify their new contract!
That’s not all.
According to the internal documents, Kaiser and the partnership unions will complete their negotiations -- which cover 90,000 workers in more than a half-dozen states -- after only four bargaining sessions!
Even more revelations are contained in the leaked document, which is entitled “2015 National Bargaining: LMP Communications Plan.” (See full document below.) Here are a few.
- On June 4, Kaiser, SEIU-UHW and the partnership unions will issue a joint press release announcing they’ve reached a tentative agreement. Kaiser workers will receive an “all-employee” e-mail from management about the agreement.
- From June 4-9, Kaiser and union officials will conduct "joint press briefings on the phone with labor writers” (ie, journalists).
- On June 8, Kaiser and union officials will publicize the new agreement in joint announcements issued through "Inside KP” and “LMP Flash.”
- On June 16-17, the partnership unions will conduct a "ratification conference" at the Sheraton Gateway LAX Hotel. The hotel rooms have already booked and reserved.
- Kaiser, SEIU-UHW, and the partnership unions have assembled a mini-army of staffers who've planned and are now executing a joint "communications plan” with "strategies and tactics" designed to “support implementation of National Agreement.”
- Among the goals of this joint staff team is the following: “Improve positioning of Kaiser Permanente and the Coalition of Kaiser Permanente among each group's key constituents" and "enhancing the KP and Coalition brands.” Translation: Regan and the Kaiser execs are using the negotiations to puff and polish their images within their organizations.
- Throughout the negotiations, union officials and Kaiser executives will be reading from the same “talking points” that are carefully crafted by the communications team. For example, at the conclusion of each of the four bargaining sessions, the communications team will issue joint "talking points" for "management and labor."
So… how is it possible for union officials and the Boss to so carefully choreograph the negotiations covering 90,000 workers across the U.S.? It’s obvious, my friends, that all of the important issues have already been signed and sealed in a backroom deal between Kaiser’s top execs and union leaders.
Here's the schedule and location of the partnership's fake bargaining:
CKPU’s Annual Delegate Conference: March 27 – 29 at Disneyland Hotel
Kickoff on National Bargaining: March 30 – April 1 at Hilton Orange County Hotel
Bargaining Session 1: April 14 – 16 at Manhattan Beach Marriott Hotel
Bargaining Session 2: April 28 – 30 at San Jose Marriott Hotel
Bargaining Session 3: May 12 – 14 at Sheraton Gateway LAX Hotel
Bargaining Session 4: June 2 – 4 at Manhattan Beach Marriott Hotel
CKPU’s Ratification of National Agreement: June 16 – 17 at Sheraton Gateway LAX Hotel
And here's one of the leaked documents: