Kaiser Coalition Hires Headhunter to Find Replacement for John August

In a sign that candidates are not exactly beating down the doors, the Coalition of Kaiser Permanente Unions has hired a “headhunter” to find someone to fill John August’s vacant desk as the Coalition's Executive Director. 

Here’s an email sent by Ken Margolies, who describes himself as an "Executive Recruiter" at a firm called Margolies and Potterton:

From: Ken Margolies

Date: June 26, 2013, 8:08:44 AM EDT

To: Ken Margolies

Subject: Please help me find a new Exec Dir for the Coalition of Kaiser Unions, based in Oakland CA,

Do you have any ideas of candidates for this?  They are especially looking for someone with experience uniting coalition partners and coordinated bargaining.

Thanks

Ken

And here’s an earlier post by the headhunter.

Ken Margolies Executive Recruiter at Margolies and Potterton

Coalition of Kaiser Permanente Unions, Executive Director The Coalition is 10 International Unions, 30 locals representing 100,000. Coalition & KP believe caregiver involvement in decision-making creates superior outcomes. Coalition funded through joint labor/management trust. Ideal candidate: experienced principal officer or director with success leading high level negotiations and coalitions, managing staff and budgets, strategic planning, building good relationships with management, patience, presence and confidence. Oakland, CA. regular travel. comp includes base salary generous benefits confidential inquiries: Ken Margolies

So why aren’t trade unionists flocking to this job posting?

Well, it’s common knowledge that SEIU-UHW’s Dave Regan and John August have already inked a deal with Kaiser to slash the health benefits and eliminate the defined-benefit pension plans for all 100,000 of the Coalition’s members during the next round of bargaining in 2015. 

As a result, these massive givebacks will become the crowning accomplishment of the next Executive Director! Not exactly the sort of career-building material you’d want on your resume… unless you plan to work for Kaiser’s H.R. Department.

Furthermore, August’s replacement will have to handle many other messes left behind by August, including multiple legal disputes connected to August's sexual harassment and bullying against multiple members of the Coalition's staff. 

Lastly, a replacement will have to swallow August’s and Regan’s brand of company unionism, which they try to peddle to workers as "21st Century unionism.” If candidates possess even a shred of integrity, they'll pass up the chance to run a “union” that’s simply an appendage of Kaiser's corporate headquarters.

So… who can possibly fill this job? Here are Tasty's ideas.

George Halvorson

(1) George Halvorson. Halvorson will soon be retiring as the CEO of Kaiser Permanente. He won't have much to do except count all the money he'll be collecting from his nine pension plans. Of course, having Kaiser's ex-CEO as the head of Kaiser workers' union might be a bit unseemly to some. But that's basically been the reality ever since Dave Regan parachuted into California.

(2) Jeffrey Skilling. Let's face it. The Coalition needs a candidate who has zero integrity and would have no hesitation cutting backroom deals to screw the Coalition's 100,000 members. Corporate America is filled with assholes like this. The only downside with Jeffrey Skilling, the former CEO of the Enron Corporation, is he's still serving jail time at the Federal Correctional Institution in Littleton, CO for insider trading, securities fraud and conspiracy. Oh well. 

(3) Goofy.  It was a stroke of luck that the Partnership Unions’ most recent shindig was at Disneyland.

It gave Coalition officials a chance to interview promising candidates like Goofy, who reportedly attended the interview wearing a cape and crown.

He's perfect to replace John August!